Like, holy cow

I am stressed. I will tell you why.

I had a test today and a project due today, I have a concert at a big fancy concert hall tomorrow and a dress rehearsal at night.

I'm the first chair oboist, and I still have to worry about new music in band.

I have a huge chore to do list at home, which I should be whittling down now instead of blogging. *sigh*

I keep having nightmares that take place in the future, only I stay the same age.

AND I have to fill out a leadership form and write an essay or whatever and go to band camp for two extra days if I even want to be considered for section leader later.

The stupid freaking pacer test which I failed the first time in PE is coming up again in two weeks and I don't want to have anymore asthma attacks.

Life is confusing in more ways that one. Or fifty.

I'm going to still have that intern/lab job/whatever it is over the summer, I'm going to have almost no spare time. I have almost no spare time now.

Oh, ya, I have an oboe lesson this Saturday too, and I have to go to stupid environmental club on Thursday because my friend wants me to. even though I promised I wasn't going to go this year any more, because it was too awkward to just latch onto some group and go with them. Because my friend wouldn't go with me. I don't even care if she sees this, she doesn't read my blog anyway.

She totally ditched me and left me behind. So did the other girl who was once my friend. Friends don't do this. She says hello if I say hello first. She looks away if I look at her. I'll email her, she'll email me back once or twice then like forget I even sent her an email.


Anyhow, Beyond this Moment is the only thing to help cool me off. Thanks, Tay. (Seriously, google search it. Beyond This Moment by Patrick O'Hearn. Most beautiful effing song in the universe.)

Thanks for reading that, if you did.


Taylor said...

I missed Beltane too, no worries...

You have far too much on your plate. Hell, I think I had a stroke READING all that.

*sigh* Yay for sleep. Sleep seems to be the only relaxing time you have, when your dreams aren't plaguing you...


Tania said...

Awwww. Cypress. I'm sorry. I didn't know. I didn't mean anything. That day, life has been hectic for me, (and now it sound like an excuse. i don't really care.) and I regretted it on the bus. I'm sorry for ever hurting you if I did... and i never meant to ditch you if I did. It might make things worse, but really, i didn't know.
And btw, I do read your blog. =-=

Shinichi-kun said...

i know what you mean about stress. I have an Honors chem project due on the 18th my APWH exam on the 16th, which was a waste of 2 yeaqrs of hard work if i fail, my 7 month aniversery with my gf on the 14th and more and more homework, yet i have less and less time, i have to go to boyscouts, religion classes, outdoorsclub, gsa, review sessions, and other places too. i hate this time of year

Cypress said...

TANIA, NOT YOU! I'm totally totally totally not talking about you!


Wow, you really read all that? Danggg. Props! =]

Well, I see you've just had the imponderable joy of stumbling onto the blog of an 18-year-old girl who can't really describe herself in 500 words or less, such as in little text boxes like these. She didn't intend her blog to really become so much like her online diary (she was hoping it would have an interesting, helpful purpose to serve the world and all) but blogging is just kind of fun. This girl's a bit of an environmentalist and a full-tilt vegetarian, a bit of an artist who can't draw, a bit of a writer who can't find time to read, and a completely hopeless romantic. She enjoys white chocolate, coloring, wading in creeks, music, Doctor Who, and speaking in third-person when it's unnecessary like this.

Now go read the rest of the blog and meet her, if you like of course. :)