I guess I'll tell you what happened on new years.

This was supposed to post forever ago, like January 2, but for some reason it didn't. Here's what happened when I was whining about being shot down and things not working between us.

"Basically, all the friends I told about this have all said that Colin loves me more than he loves Kelsey, and that his relationship with Kelsey is purely superficial and he started dating her to bide his time waiting for me. (Because I was too scared to date him... it's complicated.) they said yes, he might like her, but he loves me. Eventually I started to believe them.

Well guess what friends?

Finally I talked to him, like they were all pressuring me to (not that I blame them of course, it had to be done). Anddddd...we got it backwards.
turns out I was the dick toy.

At first I was indifferent, then I was heartbroken, next I was cool, then I was mad, and then I was scheming to get him back, and now, I'm probably in denial. I think it's stages of grief and loss or whatever all backwards.

Blog friends, you're gonna love/hate this because it means most of you were right all along.jkHe called off our college agreement reluctantly because he said she and him were kind of serious (I doubt she'd say the same if I asked her. She's an airhead who will hit you if you even say the word "sex"). But then he added, kind of as an afterthought which might have been intended as comfort, "But, you know, if something were to happen between us, I wouldn't regret it."
I asked him to clarify because otherwise I'd be wondering about a loose end for months again.
And he said, "Well hahaha if we got drunk and had sex, you know, i wouldn't regret it."

So you'd cheat on Kelsey for me, but only if you're....drunk. Cool, thanks bro.

So blog friends, here's my problem.
I mean, of course I believe it happened.
I just can't believe it.
Some part of me is saying, "ohh, he's just lying through his teeth." "he can't cheat on Kelsey and tell you he likes you." "He was just joking about the drunk sex thing." "It was his confused little way of trying to comfort me." Or something.

I think things are getting a little out of hand for me mentally.
Falling in love makes you crazy, friends. Watch your step and don't trip."

Things are different, now, and we're all good, but I can't believe I didn't tell you this.

Now, I'm over it. Thank GOD. I'm over it, I'm over him. Wait, you can't hear me, you say? Well, then, a little louder...


Update on spandex stuff: FML! i forgot to take pictures. buttt... I will be unfortunately stuck in it again. Spandex shorts and underarmour top... ah well.

And for good measure, happy groundhog day!! (it is groundhog day, right? ahhh)

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Wow, you really read all that? Danggg. Props! =]

Well, I see you've just had the imponderable joy of stumbling onto the blog of an 18-year-old girl who can't really describe herself in 500 words or less, such as in little text boxes like these. She didn't intend her blog to really become so much like her online diary (she was hoping it would have an interesting, helpful purpose to serve the world and all) but blogging is just kind of fun. This girl's a bit of an environmentalist and a full-tilt vegetarian, a bit of an artist who can't draw, a bit of a writer who can't find time to read, and a completely hopeless romantic. She enjoys white chocolate, coloring, wading in creeks, music, Doctor Who, and speaking in third-person when it's unnecessary like this.

Now go read the rest of the blog and meet her, if you like of course. :)