my seven step plan isn't going so well.

Bitch, moan, bitch moan. I really don't have the mental capacity to think about anything else. I just finished the series Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon (go ahead and judge me, but it's actually really, really, really good) and I'm like... dammit. I am just like Queen frickin' Beryl. Of course the guy of my dreams would fall for the blonde, while leaving me feeling like the villain trying to come between them.

There, I said it. Guy of my dreams. That freaking jerk. He won't text me back or anything. What if he's avoiding me? then what? What am I supposed to do? And how can he do this? Just a little over a week ago he was all like, "I love you" and stuff. He couldn't not mean it! I know he was telling the truth! So what the heck happened?

Anyway, here's the status of my seven step plan.
1. The shorts. I gave them back yesterday. Three days later than I meant to. At least I washed them. And I also gave him the shirt I bought him when I was in Florida and he still liked me. And this thank you note thing I drew. A little desperate? Probably. I'm such an idiot. Here, I took a picture of it. (several, actually.)

The notes say - haha doesn't look like either of us but whatevs. (It doesn't. haha.) LOL State hat. (forgot what it looks like *sigh*).
And I put XOXO on the bottom. Was that desperate sounding? Probably. I just put it, then realized what I wrote and thought, well, whiteout would look lame. So I just put it.

2. I did purge all the cute texts. Even though I still look at where I wrote them down in my diary.

3. I didn't eat any ice cream because I'm on a diet and feel fat lately.

4. I successfully haven't texted him like crazy over nothing. but I do find myself waiting and waiting by my phone for him to text and he doesn't. However... I've resisted the urge to text for what feels like a million times now, so I am proud of myself for that.

5. I didn't go out with my girlfriends because they still apparently hate me. Sigh. Not really, I'm just being dramatic. I didn't even tell my sister about this, and we tell each other almost everything.

6. I remembered what a giant crush I have on the drum line, but also that all of them have girlfriends or are unattainable by someone of my social status. Sigh. (also, my sister is dating one of them now. i'm happy for both of them, but i might shoot myself because this is so unbelievably unfair.)

7. I'm still listening to sad piano music.

So basically, I failed my entire seven-step plan. And all I have to cheer myself up is AP English and AP Bio summer assignments, and studying for the SAT, and Sailor Moon. God my life is so awesome right now.

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By the way, thank you so much for reading this, interwebs. I am sorry for just bombarding you with posts about bitching about crap like this. I just have absolutely no one I can tell and if I write one more page about this in my diary it might burn itself. Or I'll go crazy from not telling anyone. I'm soooo tired of bottling everything in. So thanks for at least putting up with this.