Dorm Cooking (AKA, Get On My Level)

This post is about my nonconventional cooking adventures involving a microwave, a hot water heater, and a poorly functioning refrigerator (as well as a completely broken pieceofshit blender). 

RECIPE ONE: FAKE ICE CREAM (1) which masquerades as being healthy

 

Ingredients:

Greek yogurt

Frozen fruit

Sugar of any sort (read: out of packages stolen from coffee shops ok)

1. Microwave fruit to the point where biting a piece would not break your teeth. Should be slightly squishy to the touch, but not mushy.

2. Procure bowl. Add Greek yogurt and stir in sugar, any quantity you like. Add fruit and stir well.

3. Place bowl into freezer and wait. How long you wait depends on how well your freezer works. when it feels like ice cream, eat.

RECIPE TWO: FAKE ICE CREAM (2) which doesn't even try to be healthy, really

Ingredients:

Greek yogurt (or any yogurt, really, you don't have to be as big of a snob as me)

Chocolate syrup

Chocolate chips or whatever

Sugar if you want

1. Same thing as above. 

RECIPE THREE: FAKE COOKIE DOUGH

Ingredients: 

Flour

Peanut butter

Milk/Soymilk

Coffee creamer

Sugar

Chocolate chips

1. Just mix all the shit until it tastes remotely like cookie dough. this one's hard. 

RECIPE FOUR: BREAKFAST TORTILLA

Ingredients:

Tortilla

Peanut butter

any fruit

1. Take tortilla and slather with peanut butter

2. Add fruit in a cute design or whatever

3. Roll it up and nom. 

RECIPE FIVE: VEGGIE PASTA WITH CHEESE (kinda)

Ingredients:

Pasta

Water

Bag of mixed veggies

1. Boil water 

2. Put veggies into a bowl with a little bit of water and microwave em

3. Put pasta into boiled water and put that in the microwave until noodles are softened

4. Combine your bowls

5. Strip up some string cheese and put it on top; hopefully it'll melt

RECIPE SIX: PEANUT BUTTER MOUSSE 

Ingredients:

Greek yogurt

Peanut butter

Sugar

1. combine until satisfied

2. Freeze until satisfied

3. Eat that sucka