Well...

EDIT: I take it back. My real friends do not ignore me. You know who you are. The rest of you, who probably also know who you are, fuck whatever you.


I've decided to stop the whole Self-Portrait Tuesday thing for a number of reasons.

1. I don't want to put pictures of myself online that anyone could piece together. I don't know who'd care enough to find me, but anyways.

2. Because all I have to take the pictures is a shitty little cell phone. *sigh*

3. And because I have no freaking time and I wrote half these blog entries in my written journal already.

So there you have it. If I'm super bored I might do one but it probably won't even be on a tuesday. =)


Well..... I just kind of want to say... life still sucks. Since I'm in a kind of list-y, bitchy mood, I'll make another list and share my woes with you, if anyone cares enough to read this.

1. My parents are taking me somewhere on the 8th for a birthday surprise (even though it's not until the 15th...) and I spent a whole month thinking they were taking me to the mountains or the aquarium or Virginia Beach or the art museum or whatever... but can you guess what it is? Jesus Christ Superstar. A Christian musical. I could just die. I should be happy they spent money to get good seats but... ugh they're so insensitive.

2. How the hell could I still call myself a Pagan/Wiccan/whatever the fuck I am yet still love Jesus and strive to follow his teachings?

3. Is my imaginary boyfriend actually real, like a lost soul or something that needs my help? Call me an idiot but I really think it's true. I just have no idea where I'm supposed to help send him on to, why he chose me to latch on to, if I'm right, if he's even real or I'm making him up...

4. I just lost a very important screw off my oboe and one of the keys is now hanging off. I played it yesterday and it was fine but today in class I looked down and it was goooone. I'm so tired of going to Marsh Woodwinds, and I'm pretty sure they're so tired of seeing me too.

5. I just got my ears pierced again (two holes in each ear now) and I went to school and tried to subtly show them off and nobody noticed. *sigh* And I felt like I was instantly so cool too, haha. I guess not. (*lame-o*)

6. Today, after lunch, I was sitting in the hall in front of my class, and two of my girlfriends walked by who I used to be really tight with. I said hi, one of them also said hi, and then they went and sat down the hall maybe thirty feet away from me and ignored me. I just don't get it.

7. One of my girl friends is being sooooo rude to one of my guy friends. She really talks shit about him behind his back and it's like she expects me to agree.

8. My mother is still making me do so much stuff I don't want to do. She finally realized that maybe she's pushing me a bit too hard. Naw, ya think? Let's make a mini-list. Join an orchestra which I majorly don't want to do but am still doing anyway, join like eighty million clubs, start working on my stupid Gold Award already, talk to all these people who will flick me away like you'd flick lint off your socks, be Christian when she doesn't even know what I am (well, I don't even know, so I guess it doesn't count) and Catholic at that... I'll stop there. Ugh.

9. I'm still ignored everywhere I go... still nobody, still a wallflower... With Georgie, major PMS that isn't just the P part, bitcy, itchy, and maybe a witchy. But I have no idea. I never do. And people always want me to have an idea. But I just don't fucking know.

If you didn't read this, then go away. XP