Last night I did something pretty dumb.
I slept with Colin.
Not like that. I mean it in the most innocent sense of the word. It'll be tough to explain what happened, because from the outside, this situation looks so fucked up. So I'm not even going to try. But it was kind of like our way of saying goodbye I guess.
It's 8 AM. I just went back because I wanted to let him sleep and I just wasn't getting any. I probably got 20 minutes of sleep per hour. And we went to bed probably around 2. So what's that...2 hours of sleep? I'm not tired, though.
I know it sounds creepy, but most of the time I just watched him. everyone's so peaceful when they sleep. You can listen to their breathing and it tells you when they've nodded off. I put my hand on his chest and felt his heart beat. He sleeps shirtless. He was warm and the air was cold, so we snuggled together.
I'm going to miss him, but I know I have to let him go.
Anyway, back to the original topic of this post...
Walk of shame. All the way back to my dorm. I saw one person walking. I think he knew I was shamin'. It was a little embarrassing, but fuck him for judging.
Whatever.
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